Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize