i can't believe i had my finger in that
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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