my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Randomize
