WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
