White coat. Heels.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
