Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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