I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
