Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize
