I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
