I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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