Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Randomize
