was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Drunk is a universal language darling
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
