well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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