You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
