So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
