Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize