is your mom at the bar?
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I touched a dick in church today
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
