So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
3pm strippers are depressing
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
