you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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