Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Damn victory sex feels great
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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