We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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