his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I still have a little drunk in my system
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
