forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
