3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
