You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
