So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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