YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
