So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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