Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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