I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Randomize
