I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
