hell yes lets make some ravioli
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
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