JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
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