your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
