I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
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