do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
