Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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