She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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