i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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