butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
