I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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