What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
