i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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