no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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