that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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