Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize