I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize