He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
