All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
her vagine was all disorganized.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
