i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You can't just leave with hair like that
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
