spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
